Wednesday, April 29, 2009

Newsflash: Specter a Democrat, Water is Wet

Yes folks, that's right. As of yesterday Senator Arlen Specter (R?-PA) announced that he is actually a Democrat. This just in, equally surprising: Water is in fact wet.

Excuse my while I attempt to contain my utter lack of surprise. Hold on, let me summon up Captain Obvious. Mr. Specter, you haven't been a Republican for a very long time. You certainly sealed the deal 2 months ago when you and the rest of the Three Musketeers voted my toddlers into debt. I wish I had known he was still laboring under this delusion. I could have cleared that up for him in a jiffy.

Why is he switching? He's doing it so he can get re-elected stand on principles because he is a worthless dung-heap such a stand up guy! From the Communist News Network:

"'As the Republican Party has moved farther and farther to the right, I have found myself increasingly at odds with the Republican philosophy and more in line with the philosophy of the Democratic Party,' Specter said"

Hey, Specter, have you ever heard of optical illusions? I think that's what's happening here. Allow me to clear up your confusion. See, you've been travelling left at nearly the speed of light (299792458 meters per second) so it looks like the GOP has been going right, when in fact they've been moving left too, just a lot slower.

In the end, though, you have to give him credit for standing on his values. That's what is really important here. To demonstrate this, let's check out an interview he gave just a few weeks ago on March 17th to The Hill.

"[He said] that the role of the Republican Party in Washington is too vital for him to switch to the Democratic side. 'I’m staying a Republican because I think I have a more important role to play there,' he said. 'I think the United States very desperately needs a two-party system. … And I’m afraid that we’re becoming a one-party system, with Republicans becoming just a regional party.'

'I think each of the 41 Republican senators, in a sense — and I don’t want to overstate this — is a national asset,' he said, 'because if one was gone, you’d only have 40, the Democrats would have 60, and they would control all of the mechanisms of government.'"

There you have it. A man of principle, honor, and integrity. Farewell, you worthless RINO! Now if only we can convince Senators Susan Collins and Olympia Snowe of Maine to do the same...

1 comment:

That's Mrs. Mom to you, sir. said...

You mean he wasn't a Democrat before?? Wow, I always kind of assumed he was, and that the (R) the news put by his name was a typo.... So now it's official. The Dems have no effective controls on them at all.


Rasmussen says 26% of the country now believes our economy is socialist. Expect that number to soar by 2010.